Monday, April 25, 2011

WAHM + Full Time Job - How do you jungle between both?

I realize that I am starting to write more lately because I feel that it is the best way to express how I feel inside instead of crying myself to sleep some nights.  I was looking through one of my customer's facebook page and she "liked" SAHM and claims that she is a SAHM.  I remember WAHM but did not really recall what SAHM.... it's Stay At Home Mom.  That's how it made me look back at how I started.  Some customers in the past have asked if I am a WAHM (Work at home Mom).  I said no... I am not but technically, I guess I sort of am, well, on the week nights and weekend?  

Also, I always wonder how many mom out there have to take care of a side business as well as having to work full time (over 40 hours a week)?  How do they jungle and are they successful?  If so, what is the secret to their success while I am constantly asking myself, what could I have done to be more successful?  One things for sure, I often find myself being upset for a day or two but whenever I look at my beautiful boys, I pick myself up, shake off the self pity and continue running.  I feel in my life, I cannot walk, nor jog, I have to constantly run.  

I try to tell myself that if the others can be successful, I can be and I have the determination to be better.  I see that there are people out there that sometimes tell me that "I am disappointed at your service, disappointed at your response time, disappointed at your product", those were the days I ask myself, why am I doing all these.  I should just be like others, after I get back from work, I should just grab a wine, sit and relax, watch American Idol or go to the gym to lose the extra fat that I've accumulated after having DS2.  I hope everyone understand that nobody likes to disappoint anyone.  I was brought up in a way to be honest and of course, do not disappoint anyone, the family and especially myself.  Sometimes, it is nice that people give others the benefit of the doubt, maybe something happened or maybe it's human error, I wish I have tons of people working for me whereby if an email comes in, it will be responded within 5 mins.  I wish the factory that I first dealt with did not give me wrong design or bad quality.  I just hope that people understand that I am also wanting the best for everything and everyone.  Though, I totally understand that different people have different taste and likes and dislike and I cannot expect everyone to like me, my services and my product, all I can do and promise is I will try my very best.

I have been tweeting a lot lately.  Thanks to Laureen @ momcupation, she told me that I should tweet more and thank you so much again!  I could see a more traffic coming to the side and a boost in sales.  Though, I did not realize that there are so many mom out there who blogs and are WAHM. :)  You guys rock!!!!!  Then, I started asking myself, how did I start and how did I get here?  For all the mom that have been wanting to do or start something but have not, you guys should go for it!  In my opinion, please note, this is just my personal opinion, there are some points that is really helpful, at least it got me started and it got me going.

1) Find something that you like and very familiar with.  I think this is crucial because you will find yourself smiling and explaining to people about what you are doing.  

2) Work with 1 or 2 people that motivates you.  The 2 person that I can rely on is my sister and Eve.  Let's talk about my sister first.  She is 3 years older and growing up, we use to fight a lot.  In fact, till this actual day, I always sit down and try to recall our happy moments... BLANK.... all I can think of is the fighting and how we got in trouble till dad gave us a big time and wouldn't let us in till 1am and I had mosquito bites all over the next day.  She is very determine, still remember when she was in high school, she told my dad that she wanted to be a Civil Engineer, she worked really hard and graduated with a Civil Engineering degree.  Though, several years ago, she realize that she really like Real Estate and started her own real estate business.  She was bold enough to QUIT her full time job to become a real estate agent.  Today... she is a well known agent in our city.  I am just so proud of her and she is one person that always motivate me because she totally understand what I go through.  Hmm... but she did tell me that someday, I need to choose between my full time job or becoming a WAHM.... I told her, I will strive to keep both since I love both SO MUCH.  Then... the next person is Eve, I met her through a customer and started chatting online.  I shared and taught her a lot about selling, working on web pages, posting pictures etc and we became very good friends.  There are days whereby we are upset with complication with our business and we share together and of course, we "complain" about our hubby and share sweet moment together.  I think without these people around us, it is easy to just give up.

3) Taking critiques - This is one part where I am still in the beginner's class.  I take it so personally and most time, I just feel like hiding in the closet and not coming out.  I am learning... yes I am and I know that this blog will remind myself to take these criticism and improve myself and my business.

4) DO NOT GIVE UP!!!!  This is a very very important point.  Again, from my experience, I have gone through many ups and down.  Like mention above, some times people can make me upset and I do question myself as to WHY am I doing this but I never once GIVE UP!!!!  It reminded me of my rollerblading experience when I was in college.  I was just an average student in class.  There were only 4 girls in the class majoring in Computer Science.  The guys in my class are all very good at programming, ohh no... not for me... I do terrible at that.  But anyway, I still remember having a group study one day in the library and one of my classmate was reading and he turn to me, he asked me a question.  I was able to answer, the reason is because I happened to just read that less than 15 mins ago.  He then mumbled to himself (pretty loud)_and I heard it.  He said... "Ohh.... if you know how to answer it, then, this question will not come out".  In my heart, I was asking, what do you mean?  It sounded like he was saying that I am "stupid", and if a stupid person can answer, why would the professor be so nice enough to give easy questions to all?  I was upset that day.  I took my pair of roller blades and went out alone, near my college, there was a steep hill.  I was so upset that day and I was trying so hard to blade up that steep hill but when I was half way there, I stopped because I was grasping for air and I asked myself.... why am I doing this?  Should I just give up and come down now half way OR should I go all the way up and later enjoy the breeze down all the way?  I decided that I've came so far, why give up now?  So, I continued up all the way and I got to see some beautiful scenery and realize that if I were to give up half way then, I wouldn't have gotten the opportunity to see something beautiful.  Then I continued down and since it's downhil, I did not even need to use energy and enjoyed the way down.  I then always remind myself about this incident, whenever I am about to give up, I think about this and I will go on.  

5) Networking/ Social Media - It is getting more and more crucial and honestly, again, this is another challenge for me because I am sort of anti social.  I don't have much face to face friends, I come back from work, I go straight to the hotel, and then, when I go back home, I do not go out with friends, I just sit infront of my computer and work and just stay home with my family.  Thank goodness I still can manage doing some networking with the help of Facebook, Twitter, Blogger but honestly, the best thing is to go out there and meet people.  Do play dates.... etc.  

I think there are a lot of other important points to be a successful WAHM but for me, since I do both, a full time traveling job and WAHM, scheduling to me is very important.  I am getting really forgetful lately, so, as soon as I remember something, I make sure that I write it down on my notebook.  I realize that I am hugging my notebook some nights instead of my pillow or hubby when I get home.

Anyway, thank you so much for the people that I just recently met online such as Rachel, Jennifer, Laureen, Elizabeth (Jennfier's sister, just found out today) for wanting to help me with my reviews.  I cannot say how much I appreciate the kindness and the help!  

Hopefully years from now, I will look back at this blog and be glad that I did not give up both!

1 comment:

  1. I absolutely can relate to so many things you said here. I just saw your blog while I was visiting your website (I just sent you an email about reviewing one of your diapers for my new cloth diapering channel on Youtube) and I started reading your entries. I am actually starting the Youtube channel for many of the reasons you stated. I am a SAHM and a FTM (first-time mom) and I moved from Florida to California. I don't know anyone here but it's not like it matters much because I am sort of anti-social as well. I am shy and an introvert and take rejection really bad. I always get afraid of starting things because I fear they will turn out bad and no one will like them and I take it very personal. However, I loved your incident with the roller blades. It's beautiful, and it will stick with me as well. One thing I am passionate about is cloth diapering and like your first tip, it is something I love and feel very good talking about so a lot of the people (online now since I moved) that I speak to about cloth diapering have requested more information and to see my cloth diapers and my advice. Like you, I am so grateful for online social networks because I am so comfortable writing than being face to face, which is very important like you said. I don't get out because I have a very demanding baby and I have no car since my hubby takes it to work and I spend all my days indoors. So keeping in touch with my friends and talking about cloth diapers keep me from going crazy! I have felt depressed sometimes because I feel like I am not doing anything with my time but then I look at my daughter and I realize I am giving her my all and that is very noble and something a lot of moms don't have the luxury of doing. I also remember that in times when I am sad, I count my blessings and see that although I moved so far from my brother, my friends, and my beloved mom who is like my best friend, I have seen things in California that I have never seen in my life. Mountains are beautiful. California is beautiful. And life can be beautiful. I count all my blessings and I feel so much better. I even miss my in laws and my husbands big family. I have a small family (my mom and my brother) so when I married him I thought "wow! I have a huge family now"-but then we moved. But I still have my hubby and babygirl and I get to be with her and love her and give her my time which is amazing. Thank you so much for your insight and your wonderful tips-they are all true and thanks again for sharing your story.


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